more on bottoms falling out

wow, i really have to force myself not to start with the word "so." anyhow...as i was loading the washer with nasty socks earlier, i started thinking about how i have been interacting with people i meet at church. i feel like i am a little too aware of my image these days. not necessarily how i look; it's more of how i come across, what i say, if i am witty, etc. it's a bit of a 180 from before, at our last church, because i don't think i worried too much about those things. perhaps that was a mistake, perhaps it was not. i am not sure. i am just afraid of becoming overly concerned, and perhaps not completely being myself. i am going to have to ask Jesus to help me with that, because knowing that i am human i could see it becoming a problem. after experiencing the doubts and questions that i have over the past 8 months, i suppose it's not all that unusual that i am feeling this way. but once again it's not something i want to become a part of who i am. it would seem that i am trying to protect my family against the bottom falling out...like i have any control over that sort of thing. if God wants us elsewhere, that's where i want to be. if something happens that is a result of other people making bad choices, God can use that to His advantage. and no matter what, i still have Jesus which is really and truly all i need.